Bad place
March 9, 2013 @ 7:08 PM
I've been to this bad place so many times now. It comes and go but it doesn't get any easier. I don't expect anyone to understand what it really is or for anyone to even try to understand because, well, no one can. I don't know how to explain it either. It's more than just emotions. Bad things go through my mind and I tend to let them. I swallow everything in and settle it down, I guess somewhere in my mind.
I'm not me when this happens. I shut everyone and everything out. I rather be alone because it makes me feel safe. I feel every inch of pain. I let painful memories come back and I would just wallow in this dark place without any need to come out.
I don't know how long it will last this time. I don't know what triggers this and I don't know how to stop it either. I just let it consume me.
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