Ball of sun
December 1, 2010 @ 8:26 PM
To give me all your love is all I ever asked cause what you don't understand, is I'd catch a grenade for ya. Throw my hand on the blade for ya. I'd jump in front of a train for ya.You know I'd do anything for ya. See I would go through all this pain, take a bullet straight through my brain, yes I would die for you baby. - Bruno Mars
I realize something when I woke up this morning. The world doesn't stop for anyone and anything. Just because you're sad, you can't expect it to stop and wait till everything picks up. You have to make it work on your own. Initially I wanted to just stay in bed, forgo school, stay under the covers and just sleep because it seem to be the easiest thing to do. I did not want to wake up and deal with all those emotions while trying to balance out the day. But for some reason, I mustered up the courage to get out of bed and face the day. I can't be hiding out every time I'm upset, I have a whole lot of things planned out and some things cannot be put on hold just because I'm upset and I don't have it in me to do it. My life has to go on and I have so much more to plan out ahead.
And as I woke up and get myself ready for school, mum made it upon herself, cheering me up in her most subtle ways. That's when I knew, even if I can't do it for me, others are dependent on me for a better day. So I brace myself up and smile my day through even though my heart felt like it's been stabbed. Having to made through the whole day without breaking down especially with the guilt tagging to me all the way helps me prove to myself that I am strong. I used to doubt everyone who told me that I'm strong because I knew I was not. But now, I will be okay, things will be okay and we'll see how it will pan out. Things will pick up from where it left off, hopefully.
xoxo ♥
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