Dirt Rug
July 10, 2011 @ 10:14 PM
You know what. This is me. I'm bad at making people feel better no matter how I try. I'm bad at giving admirable advice, bad at comforting people, bad at saying things that's on my mind, bad at making things better at the very least. I'm a klutz. I let people trample on all over me like a dirt rug over and over again. I let people make me feel horrible and yet say nothing about it. I don't like people giving me looks of pity or sympathizes me to make me feel better because it makes me feel even more pathetic then it did before. I am petty. I let little things get to me. I have the tendency to put people before me regardless the good or bad consequences it brings me. I let myself get disappointed all over again. This is who I am.
I am not happy most of the time. I worry a little too much. I over-think, just like everyone else. I over-react. People expect so much from me and I feel like I, myself am a disappointment. I have tonnes of questions. I question myself and everyone in my life but it's all in my head. Nothing ever comes out because I am scared of the answers.
I'm tired. I'm tired of feeling worthless. I'm tired of feeling like I am never good enough. I'm tired of feeling like nobody ever did give a care in the world. I might sound really selfish but really, I am just truly tired.
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