19 in 19
October 4, 2010 @ 10:53 PM
In 19 more days, I will turn 19. Unfortunately, I am not that excited for it. I don't even know what I want for my birthday. I guess that is why. I told H about it and he told me that he knows how to get me excited and that he has a surprise for me. I got a little excited over that. I'm trying to count down to see if I will eventually look forward to it.
All my birthday celebrations are a little predictable, I guess this year I want things to be different. For the past few years, I've somewhat spent my birthdays in the same sequence. My family would probably get me a cake and we would celebrate it when midnight strikes. My friends would probably arrange some surprise in school. I might meet up with the gang, depending on their availability and I would spent most of it with H. I mean, I look forward to every surprise they have up their sleeves for me. Its what makes it really enjoyable. But I somehow want something different this year. I still want my time with H just him and I, and I want to spend it with most of my friends. Sigh, I don't know. I don't know what I want.
I guess the need to be in control all the time is really not doing me much good. I'm not exactly one who favors surprises. Truth is I fear them because one I have no control over them but this year, I am hoping for a whole lot of surprises. Its not that much to ask for right?
xoxo ♥
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