January 29, 2011 @ 1:01 PM
Everybody has pride and everybody wishfully hopes not to get their pride hurt. The other day, I was indirectly insulted of my English language. As pathetic as it sounds, insulting me of my English language hurts me. I don't mind people jokingly made comments about my language especially when it comes to my mother tongue. I mean I am not proud that my Malay is somewhere in between average and below. I am used to people jokingly, whether they mean it or not criticizing my Malay but I really do not like if people criticize my English. Do you think I want to suck especially at the language that is supposed to be second nature to me? I'm not trying to sound conceded and boast about how good my language is. I am open to correction, after all you learn best from your mistakes. I know my English is not as superb as yours but I am proud that it is above average. I really do not appreciate you looking me in the eye and criticize me of how my language is not good enough for you. I have worked hard to be where I am right now.
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A Constellation of Stars
January 19, 2011 @ 10:39 PM
So lately, I've been so fascinated about the constellation of stars especially when the 13th star sign was added to the zodiac sign. Its not that I am a true believer of the horoscopes but I have always find them fascinating. The way it says certain things about you and as odd as it is a part of you actually believed it.
Since the 13th sign was changing all the other horoscope ranges, I went on 'researching' about it known as Ophiuchus. It sounds really off and I can't even pronounce it. I was reading on about how it was always there just that it was never included in the constellation because it was supposedly unlucky and there was actually more to it such as how the sun make its way around the constellation. Furthermore, unlike the other zodiac signs that associates itself with creatures like Scorpio with a scorpion or Libra with the sun, Ophiuchus is associated with a real person also known as 'the serpent holder'. The more I read about it the, more it fascinates me.
Then I went to read on about my zodiac sign, Scorpio. It was said that Scorpios are a contradiction. We could be the best and the worst of both world. We are independent and clingy, authoritative and weak, loving and cold, intense in and about almost everything, mysterious, stubborn, jealous, and revengeful.
After reading on about the traits of a Scorpio, I began to re-evaluate myself, or so you say it. And I have to agree that most of it rings true to me. Especially about being revengeful and self-destructive. It is not that I seek revenge every time but when someone does me wrong, I find it hard to forgive and forget. And when I do forgive, I hardly forget. I also noticed how self-destructive I can get especially when I am my lowest point. Then I realize that over time, I have become so bitter. I get angry at little things. I am less forgiving than when I was before. And it is not something I am proud of. But he things I do now and the things I used to do in the name of love are still on the same road.
xoxo ♥
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Light As A Feather, Heavy As A Brick
January 6, 2011 @ 12:56 AM
You know how light it can make you feel when you are floating on water? Its the only place where you can have the sun shinning in your face and at the same time feel as light as a feather. You do nothing else but enjoy the serenity of that moment as the water alters the decibels in your ear so you could partially shut the world out. It made you feel so free as you let the waves lead the way. Then all the things you have shoved aside came rushing into your head like a flood and you began to feel heavy again.
In between that peaceful feeling and the heavy feeling that came back and overwhelms you in an instance, you start to slowly sink in. You are left with a choice of continuing to let your body drown its weight down or you could wake up and face what you left a moment ago.
Tonight, I chose to let myself drown down. I chose to let the heaviness pull me in. All of this metaphorically. I am exhausted from what I had to deal with today. It may sounds so melodramatic of me, but I am indeed feeling heavy tonight and I had no intention of trying to balance everything out and make my way out of the water, not right away.
Auf wiedersehen
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Seventy-One
January 3, 2011 @ 3:16 PM
For what it's worth, we came a long way and it stills feels like it was yesterday. You have been a great sport and I have never been happier. Thank you for standing by me no matter what. Thank you for being so patient with me and accommodating to my every whine and wimp. I know I get on your nerves a lot and I would probably still do so, but thank you for still loving me the same.
xoxo ♥
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