Lost In The Clouds
June 19, 2011 @ 11:16 AM
I don't know what happened for us to be here like this. Maybe it was all the little things that happened, that created this distance between us. Maybe it's the indignation that I still have towards you. Maybe its all those times that we argued and it made me feel angry towards you or all those decisions you made without thinking of the consequences. Maybe it was all of that. We may never talk to each other anymore but that does not mean I don't miss you. We are at a place to high to be seen and saved.
It's hard for me to accept what we have become. I tried, I tried to make it better for our sake, for her sake but I can't. I can't be the only one trying, that is not how it works. Now the closest we will ever get to each other is just to be in the same room. Even that we have to try not to make things awkward. And the closest we ever get to speaking to each other is you talking to me in a manner I do not appreciate.
But at the end of the day, you are still who you are to me and I miss you. I miss the times when you would come talk to me, ask how my day was, how my life was going but now all there is are silence. Even if we do try to strike a conversation, it would be really awkward. I miss the way you would pull me in your embrace because you need a little strength. I miss the times just laughing with you. I miss you.
Even if is is wishful thinking, I still wish maybe someday, we would get back what we have lost. So this is for you. Maybe someday, I will find it in me to forgive you for all that you've done and maybe you would do the same to me.
I love you, always will. Happy Father's Day Dad.
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